Ketamine: A powerful animal tranquilizer that may cause hallucinations, distortion of reality, loss of feeling of limbs and muscles and mind/body separation. Haha. Yup. All of the above. I would have “gone with it” like the nurses were telling me to but it was a a disgusting high. Can’t be picky though. All other drugs were making me vomit. And vomit = excruciating pain.

Last Sunday, after a little bit of beach and a ride, while driving north of Brisbane, Chris and I were hit by a large SUV/4WD vehicle that was speeding and out of control. It was going sideways and into our lane over a crest in the road and hit us head/ side on. It happened so fast. One minute we were driving to a beautiful lookout in one of my favourite zones in Queensland, The Glass House Mountains, next minute all went black.

Chris suffered a fractured rib and got banged around quite a bit. He got a huge scare and is a bit sore. Me, not so lucky.

Since I bore the brunt of the impact on my side of the car, I have at least 6 broken ribs-some displaced, blood in my lung, 2 stable fractures in my pelvis-one close to the joint so no weight bearing allowed, stable lacerations of both liver and spleen, concussion, black eye and several lacerations, punctures, stitches, scrapes and bruises all over my body. In fact, part of my right arm looks like it’s been through a meat grinder, no exaggeration. Still pulling glass out of my hair.

In a nutshell:

I was unconscious for about 30 seconds to a minute, Chis thought I was gone and was holding me and trying to wake me. Poor guy, I can’t imagine….but I woke up! 🙂 Reality hits. Huge state of shock. I knew Chris was alright. Huge relief. Wasn’t sure if I was alright. So scared. But I was determined to live. Seemed like ages for the paramedics to arrive but in reality, they came fast, within 15 minutes. They stabilized me, pulled me out of what used to be our car, most pain ever. Back of the ambulance, cut off my clothes, sticking of needles began. At the hospital, drugs and tripping out began. Rolling me over to vomit began. So much pain. To intensive care after hours and hours of being stabilized. Rest. Stoned. Waiting for theatre to scrub and close up all my wounds. 4 tubes going into my arms, one into my bladder. All feeding me or draining me. Next day, finally go to theatre, get put to sleep, cleaned up, stitched up, just a passenger. Back to ICU. Being babysat every minute. Try to eat. Can’t. Force myself. Vomit. Reassure family and friends. I’m alive, I have Chris and I will get through! Just sooo grateful. Overwhelming love. In and out of sleep. Visit from Chris’s sisters and mum ❤ <3<3 Moved to Ward, woken up for tests every hour. Visits from Physios, need to get me up and around, good for my lungs. Get me standing, walking with crutches, doing breathing excercises. Yes, can move around a bit!  Nurses are so amazing. Through the worst of it….

CRAZY!!!!???? Yes, but we are alive. We have our limbs and our brains and each other. We will heal and be back on the bikes at some point. Very grateful, to say the least.

I was due to fly out back home to Whistler the day after this accident so, as expected, plans have changed and work/coaching/riding have been interrupted. Laying low and healing mentally and physically is in the cards for the next little while. Loud noises scare me, experiencing some vertigo. I’m out of hospital now and chilling at Chris’s parents place. Grateful for family. Off the gnarly drugs and on to regular pain killers, thank god. Ew! I hate drugs! But necessary sometimes…Gaining my appetite back, lost a lot of weight. I can’t fly for at least a couple weeks because of my ribs/lungs so we plan on being back in Whistler for mid May. Hopefully Chris will be back to full riding form by then. For me, not so sure how long this is going to take, have to rethink the whole season, taking it day by day 🙂

Thank you for all the well wishes and support from all our friends, fans, family, strangers. Thank you to all the First Responders, random passer-by lady for holding my hand and keeping me calm, Paramedics in the ambulance, hospital staff, EVERYONE. Thank you,  universe, for this opportunity to learn, love, grow, get strong 🙂